First off, Happy Anniversary!
Mara: We’ve been married for 14 years today.
I heard your success with Together Dating inspired Duane’s mother to try the service.
Duane: Yeah, they got married the summer of 1998.
Mara: I think she only went through two or three introductions before she met the man she married, and they just celebrated their 11th anniversary.
How did each of you originally find out about the service?
Duane: My mother had gotten a flyer in the mail, and she suggested I take a look at it.
Mara: I worked down the hall from where a Together Dating office used to be located. I was single at the time. One night, I walked down and peeked in to see what the office looked like. I was surprised to find there were people working that late.
They said, “Oh, are you single? Are you looking to meet someone?” At that time, I was not looking to meet anyone, but they made it sound so appealing. They said they had a big pool of applicants and lots of guys looking to meet people. So, I thought why not? I’ll come in, meet with them and see what it’s all about.
Why did you want to try Together Dating matchmaking?
Mara: I was new in town and didn’t really have a way of meeting people. Also, I was in grad school and working two jobs. I just thought I don’t know of any other way I would ever meet anyone. I don’t do the bar scene.
Duane: I had just turned 30 a few months prior, and I couldn’t find anybody available anywhere – not at my church, not in everyday contacts, not through activities I did. There was just no one to meet who I would have considered eligible, and I had not been in a relationship in several years.
I decided I was ready to get back into dating. The first person they sent me was Mara.
Wow! Duane, the first person Together Dating set you up with eventually became your wife?
Mara: Yeah, isn’t that amazing? He married his very first introduction.
Do you feel like the service understood what you were looking for right from the start?
Duane: Mara and I had a lot of things in common, so they did a pretty good job.
What were your first impressions of each other?
Duane: Talking to her on the phone the first time was just like talking to somebody I had known for years. There wasn’t that awkwardness of trying to figure out what to say.
Mara: Right away, I knew Duane was different from all the others they had sent me. By the time we met in person, it felt like we were old friends just from two conversations on the phone.
When we eventually met in person, that’s when I realized, wow, there is chemistry there, too.
What did you do on your first date?
Mara: I was a student at the time. On our first date, I took him on a tour of the campus. We went to a little coffee house and listened to a musical group playing there.
Duane: We really liked each other, and we just hit it off right off the bat.
Tell me about the proposal.
Duane: Actually, Mara kind of proposed to me. We had talked about it after we had been going out for about a year.
Mara: I don’t really remember the day where I really made a formal proposal. We just kind of said let’s get married. I remember the day we went and picked out a ring. I guess that’s when we officially got engaged.
How did you opinion of matchmakers change through this process?
Duane: I kept an open mind about it. I didn’t have a bad opinion or a good one going in, but I felt pretty good after we got hooked up.
Mara: My opinion changed, too. I did think it must only be losers, people in their 50s and people who can’t get a date. There must be something wrong with them that they have to resort to that.
Yet even though all the guys I met up until Duane weren’t the right man for me, they were all very successful, good-looking men. These were not losers. They were just people that for various circumstances couldn’t meet women the traditional way. They were either very into their job and didn’t have a lot of time for a social life or were new to the area like I was.
What did you like best about working with Together Dating?
Duane: The fact that they were going to find somebody for me instead of me having to make the effort all on my own. I liked the fact that they didn’t use a computer. I know how stupid the machines can be.
When you’re dealing with something personal, trying to match people up for a personal relationship, I wouldn’t have been too comfy with just taking data from one person and data from another and feeding it into a machine and letting it do the selection. The fact that you had human beings that would sit down and not only go by what’s on the paper but use their own instincts, I think that is a better way to do it.
Mara: I think even in this day and age when you do have more resources, and they do have the computerized dating services, I think the personal touch is still the best way to go.
Why else would you recommend Together Dating?
Mara: It worked for us.
Duane: It worked for us, and it worked for my mother and now stepfather.
