The Right One - Bob & Christine
”I could just tell in my heart that this is the person I love, who I would love to spend the rest of my life with."
”It truly is remarkable how similar Bob and I think and agree on so many subjects. If you were to separate us and ask us the same questions, I think that most of the time we’d give the same answers.”
How was your dating life before you joined The Right One?
Bob: Mediocre. Without the service, I wasn’t going out that much.
Christine: Since my divorce six and a half years ago, my
life has been extremely work and business oriented. I did not want to
date anybody. I did not want to socialize with anyone but family and
friends. I had a very bad marriage and I was just not really ready to
date. It took me six and a half years to join the dating service
because I did want a companion and I thought that I was finally ready.
Were you initially skeptical of matchmakers and dating sites?
Christine: Absolutely. I really don’t want to have to post my
picture online and meet all of these people if I have no idea if
they’re telling me the truth about themselves or their backgrounds. I
truly believe in two things; one is that most people don’t tell the
truth because they want you to accept them, and secondly, you have to
have your own gut feelings when you meet someone. The truth is
everything to me. I’ve lived the other way and that’s one reason that I
like Bob, love Bob for who he is, because from the first moment we met,
I could tell that he just wants to be himself as I do, and it just
works.
Most online daters look at photos first, and I don’t really want to be, both Bob and I don’t really want to be displayed. If you look at me or him, and you looked at ten other photos, perhaps you wouldn’t have picked us. I’m just being honest with you. Most men, when they look at online websites, check out how you look first. They know nothing else. They read something and oh great but what they were really looking for, what their first attraction was is your looks, and in this case, I never saw Bob’s photo before we met. I take Bob for Bob and Bob takes Chris for Chris and that’s the beauty of it.
What inspired you to try The Right One?
Bob: I think they were doing mailings when I joined and so I
called them and tried to find out what they were all about. They always
invite you in for an interview, of which I’m skeptical. But I believe
it was advertisements that inspired me.
If you were skeptical, what made The Right One stand out?
Bob: Probably their sales pitch. I think I was probably just ready.
Christine: I didn’t get a mailer. I actually saw a sign. I decided that this was a big step, but what did I have to lose? I’ll just find out more information about the company. And when I found out that you didn’t have to show photos and that you could just tell your story, I liked that. But what I really liked about their process is the amount of questions that they ask you to make sure they’ve matched you up with the proper person. And that’s why I’m still with Bob. I didn’t want someone showing up with a car that just died out and doesn’t start. I didn’t want somebody showing up with ripped blue jeans. They know what I make and they know what Bob makes and they asked if I had a preference, and I said not really, but he would have to at least have enough money to own nice clothes and to take me out. I don’t want a person who is barely making ends meet when I’m a successful woman. But they really did ask the appropriate questions, and it made me feel comfortable that whoever my mate was going to be had to answer those same questions. And it truly is remarkable how similar Bob and I think and agree on so many subjects. If you were to separate us and ask us the same questions, I think that most of the time we’d give the same answers, except for maybe mechanics. How about it Bob?
Bob: Yeah well, that’s true.
Christine: If you asked Bob about computers and Chris about
mechanics, you will get no response from Chris on mechanical stuff and
you will get no response from Bob on computers.
Bob, how did you like working with The Right One?
Bob: They were exciting. The questions that you answer are
pretty straightforward. They ask you to be honest. I know some people
are and some people aren’t. I did answer everything honestly. If I
remember correctly, it was a fairly long process but the questions are
very thorough, providing you answer them honestly. So they are trying
to match you up. Regarding their sales pitch, they’ve got the right
person doing it. They make you feel good about joining and that
everything is going to work out wonderfully. When you’re going to pay
whatever the dollar amount is you’re investing and you better be
willing to do this and you’re excited about doing this. And Chris and I
both don’t like the bar scene, and let’s see… I tried Jewel. That
doesn’t work.
Wait, what have you tried?
Bob: Jewel. The old joke… you stand in the produce aisle.
Christine: And you bang somebody with your cart.
Bob: Yeah, you bang them with your cart “accidentally.” Jewel is our local grocery store.
How does the interview process work?
Bob: After you fill out the questions, they have some way of totaling up numbers that are applied to a rating system.
Christine: It has to do with five different categories. One was religion, and I forget what the other categories were. They had to do with personality traits, nationalities, that sort of thing. There were many different kinds of questions.
How many dates did you go on before you met each other?
Bob: I can’t put a number to it. I can remember but quite a few actually.
Christine: None. Bob was the first man that I met.
Do they encourage you to meet more people?
Christine: Oh yes. They actually sent out a survey and asked how
Bob was, and then they asked if I wanted another date, and I told Bob
that they asked me, and Bob told me that he had put me on hold and I
didn’t know what that was.
Bob: I put myself on hold.
Christine: So I did it as well, because I wanted to give Bob a
chance. They called again just recently and asked if I wanted to go on
another date, and I told them that I’m still dating Bob. They said
‘Okay, we just want to make sure that we give you what we promised. You
have plenty of dates left.’ I said that I understand but I don’t think
that’s fair to Bob.
Who made the initial contact?
Christine: I think I did.
Bob: Yeah, because you were on vacation and I think if I
remember you called when you got back and I hadn’t had a chance to call
at that point. I think I had her name a couple of days and I hadn’t had
a chance to call and Chris called when she got back from her vacation.
Christine: Actually… there was another person, but we
never got to date. I’m glad part of the interview process consisted of
talking to each other on the phone, because I think that’s really
important. Bob made me laugh. We spent hours on the phone before we
met. A couple of phone calls that lasted hours and when I realized this
I thought ‘Oh my God, I was on the phone with him for 2 hours. What am
I thinking?’ It actually was fun and very enjoyable and piqued my
curiosity. How could this happen? I don’t believe this.
Can you describe your first date?
Bob: Oh, tell the T-shirt story.
Christine: We met at Wildfire, a bar and restaurant, intending to have a drink. It was very busy. Bob had my cell phone number and I had his, and he called just as I pulled into the parking lot. He said, ‘Ah, I see you now. Are you in the beige Taurus?’ I said yes and he said, ‘Okay, at least I know what car you’re driving.’ Keep in mind that we had no idea what each other looked like.
So… I step out of my car and I see a tall, scraggly looking guy with holes in the knees of his jeans and sweat under his arms, starting to walk towards me. Then, as soon as he sees me, he turns and walks the other way. I’m thinking, ‘Oh my God, at least that’s over with. With all that, I guess he didn’t like the way I looked. I’m going in for a drink anyway.’
I have no idea that Bob is standing at the door. I walk by and he says, ‘Hi Chris’ and I said, ‘Bob??’ I was surprised and happy to realize after that, that this was my Bob.
Bob: I was a step up from the T-shirt man.
Christine: After that, I started chuckling and I told him
the story and he started to laugh. We headed to the bar and it was
packed and he said ‘Oh come on, I’m harmless, let’s have dinner.’ I
agreed but I had a secondary plan with my family who knew that I was
going out on my first date. They were all worried about me even though
I’m 50 years old. They planned an emergency call to come in a half hour
later that consisted of ‘Chris, are you okay? You’d better come home
because of <random excuse>.’ At this point, if the date weren’t
going well, I would inform Bob that I had to leave. So I had an exit
strategy prepared. But we started talking, and when the call did come
through, I told them that I was fine. I could tell Bob was honest right
from the start. I liked his sense of humor. He was fun to be with and
everything we talked about, well not everything, I mean, I may have
elaborated on my past marriage a little bit, but that was the anger
still coming out. We basically had a good time together.
Bob: And a really good meal.
Bob, what was your first impression of Christine?
Bob: When I first saw Chris, I thought she was very good
looking, and I still do. I’m always nervous meeting someone for the
first time. What do you talk about? What do you say? I try to be
myself. So the whole time we’re initially meeting outside I’m thinking
‘Oh geez, what do I say? Don’t sound like an idiot this time.’
Then it just felt effortless. Her personality was so relaxing. She’s funny, she’s intelligent and everything just flowed together so smoothly. I had felt so honored that I wasn’t the t-shirt guy.
How has your relationship progressed? How long have you been dating?
Christine: We’ve been dating for eleven months and we’re
going to Vegas for our one-year anniversary. Bob suggested that we go.
We’re going to a couple of comedy clubs and will just enjoy a couple of
days in Vegas.
Do you have like a defining moment when you fell in love?
Bob: I don’t know if I can personally name an exact day and
time. You just feel something in your heart. You just know that the
person that you’re sitting across from is that special. I came from a
marriage of 18 years; it’s hard to get back into the swing of things
and find someone who makes you feel the way I was feeling with Chris. I
honestly haven’t had that feeling, and I say this honestly, in my
entire life, including my married life. I can’t say exactly when, but I
could just tell in my heart that this is the person I love, who I would
love to spend the rest of my life with. I want to make this work. I’m
going to work as hard as I can, hopefully not making the previous
mistakes that I've made. I’ve also learned that I have to be myself.
She lets me be myself. Honesty and trust are the two most important
things, and everything between us just clicked so smoothly, so
wonderfully. I’ve met her family and just really enjoyed the family too
and they accepted me, hopefully. Chris’s personality and everything
just brought out the love that I have that I’ve been wanting to give to
somebody.
Christine: I actually mentioned this subject to Bob in
conversation, just to feel him out, asking him hypothetically ‘What if
someone were to fall in love, and if the other person wasn’t in love,
how would you react in that situation?’ Remember that, Bob?
Bob: You got me there.
Christine: We were at the bar having a drink, and I said,
‘You know, the most uncomfortable thing is when you find that you’re in
love with someone, and that someone isn’t in love with you and how
that’s always difficult to deal with.’ It was on my mind. I did fall in
love with Bob; and oh, it didn’t take very long either. I’m going to
say it probably took about six weeks - there wasn’t a special moment
for me. I just felt happy, passionate; I felt everything a woman feels.
I felt sexy, I felt wonderful, all of those feelings, and I knew that
it was time to tell him. And he actually said, ‘I’m glad you said it
first because I’ve been feeling this for a while.’ So it didn’t take
very long for us, and I felt comfortable that he said that. It’s been a
long time since I’ve said those words to someone and meant it, and to
this day I still do.
What do your friends think about how you two met?
Bob: All my friends know we met through the club. I think some
are surprised at first. They, like myself, are probably skeptical about
organizations that they aren’t familiar with. But all of my friends are
long married anyhow, so they were just glad that I’d found someone
special.
What are your future plans? You mentioned Vegas. Are you staying anywhere special?
Bob: Paris.
Christine: I always stay at the Paris Hotel. What are our future plans? I think Bob and I are just living and enjoying things day by day. We do plan events, we do plan things together but as far as anything other then that, and I don’t think that there is going to be anything different for a little while anyway. Bob?
Bob: What are my plans? What are my intentions? I think right now we’re at a good steady pace. We enjoy everything together. Personally I’m hoping down the road that we can make this a little more permanent. We’ve talked about that in the past a bit but right now we’re comfortable where we are.
Christine: We do talk about moving in together, but with the economy the way it is and trying to sell both of our houses cause I don’t want to move in his… it’s too little. I mean if I had to I would, and vice versa with Bob. But I think we would like to make a new start together. And we’ve talked about that, but with the way things are, who knows when we would sell our houses and what we would have to do in the transition? But I am committed to Bob.
Bob: And me, also.
Do you have any advice for others searching for love via The Right One?
Bob: I say be yourself. I think both men and women make up
a lot of stories to make themselves sound better. Just be honest, be
yourself, and treat the other person as you would like to be treated.
That’s my opinion.
Christine: I have to agree with Bob on that. Be ready. If
you’re a person who hasn’t dated in two and a half years because you
were with the biggest jerk in the world, just make sure you’re over it
and are now ready.
